16 Financial Decisions Every Widow Has to Make
Finances
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By Clarence L. Haynes Jr., Crosswalk.com
Losing a spouse is one of the deepest heartbreaks a person can ever endure. It’s not just an emotional loss; it shakes the very foundation of your daily life, spiritually, emotionally, and yes, financially.
If you’re married, the sobering truth is that one day, one of you will go first. Statistics tell us it is usually the husband. According to Social Security data, a 65-year-old man has an average life expectancy of 19 more years, while a 65-year-old woman has an average life expectancy of about 22 more years. That may not seem like a significant difference, but in real terms, it often means the wife outlives her husband.
I know the reality of losing a spouse firsthand because my first wife passed away before me. Though I was a widower, the lessons I learned can help both widows and widowers alike. Even though you can never fully prepare for the moment your spouse dies, you can prepare a roadmap with financial decisions to avoid being overwhelmed when vulnerable.
Here are 16 financial decisions every widow (or widower) must make, broken down into three stages: immediate (1–3 months), short-term (3–12 months), and long-term (beyond a year).
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Financial Decisions Within the First 1-3 Months
When the worst happens, the immediate aftermath can feel overwhelming. There’s grief, paperwork, and a sudden pile of responsibilities. Here are some essential financial steps to take right away.
1. Think about Your Daily Living Expenses
Life doesn’t pause when your spouse dies. The bills still come. You’ll need to know where your checking, savings, and emergency accounts are and how to access them. Some spouses handle all the finances, while others share the responsibility. Either way, you must secure a plan for covering your day-to-day expenses so you’re not left in crisis.
2. Get Multiple Copies of the Death Certificate
Here’s a practical but essential step. You’ll need at least 10–15 certified copies of your spouse’s death certificate for various purposes. Banks, Social Security, insurance companies, and other institutions will require proof of death to process claims or name changes. Trust me, having these copies ready will save you time and frustration.
3. File a Life Insurance Claim
If your spouse had life insurance, contact the insurance company to file a claim. Remember, there’s no rush to decide what to do with the payout. It’s okay to let yourself grieve before making big financial moves. If you don’t need the money immediately, deposit it in a high-yield savings account until you are in a position where you can make clearheaded decisions.
4. Contact Social Security
As a widow(er), you may be eligible for survivor benefits based on your spouse’s Social Security record. Call or visit your local Social Security office to explore your options. One strategy for widows under the age of 70 is to take the survivor benefit first and delay their own Social Security retirement benefit until it maximizes at age 70. A financial advisor can help evaluate the best approach for your specific situation.
5. Contact Their Former Employer
If your spouse had still been working, there may be additional benefits available to you. These could include unpaid salary, accrued vacation pay, life insurance provided through the employer, or access to retirement funds such as a 401(k) or pension. Ask about health benefits as well. Some employers offer temporary spousal coverage after an employee’s passing.
6. Cover Funeral Costs
Planning a funeral during such an emotional time can feel overwhelming. The average funeral costs around $8,300, according to the National Funeral Directors Association. If no prior savings or funeral insurance were in place, consider using the life insurance payout or emergency funds. Some funeral homes offer payment plans if you need additional flexibility.
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Financial Decisions Within the First 3-12 Months
Once you handle immediate expenses and processes, you’ll need to think about how to organize your financial life for the long term. This phase often requires deeper reflection and planning.
7. Review their outstanding debts
Create a list of all current debts, including mortgages, car loans, credit cards, and personal loans. Here’s what to figure out:
-Are any debts solely in your spouse’s name?
-Which debts are urgent, and which can be refinanced or negotiated?
-Are balances manageable with your current income?
If dealing with debt feels overwhelming, consider consulting a financial advisor or debt counselor for guidance.
8. Reassess Your Income
Your household income is likely to have changed significantly. Start by identifying all new income sources:
-Survivor Social Security benefits.
-Income from investments, annuities, or pensions.
-Potential earnings from your own job, if you are still working.
Understanding the total income flowing into your household will help you create a sustainable budget moving forward.
9. Consider Your Housing
A big question many widows face: “Should I keep living here?” Take your time with this decision. Some factors to consider include:
-The affordability of your current home.
-Whether it feels too large or emotionally difficult to maintain.
-Proximity to family or friends for support.
Remember, you don’t have to make a choice right away—often, the first year is best spent adjusting before making permanent changes.
10. Make Adjustments to Your Estate Planning
If you’ve inherited property, retirement accounts, or other assets, ensure that you update the beneficiaries and titles accordingly. Remove your spouse as a beneficiary where applicable and ensure your own will and estate plans reflect your current wishes. If you’re unsure where to start, an estate attorney can make this process seamless.
11. Tax Planning
As a widow, your tax status will probably change from “Married Filing Jointly” to “Single,” which may lower deductions or increase tax liability. Consult a tax advisor to adjust your strategy so you can avoid any surprises come tax season. If you’ve inherited an IRA or other retirement accounts, be mindful of required minimum distributions (RMDs). Missing this could cause you a tax liability if you are not aware.
Financial Decisions for Beyond the First Year
After the first year, financial life will begin to stabilize, but you’ll still need to make adjustments for the long haul.
12. Your Investment Strategy
Your life circumstances are different now, and the investment strategy you followed as a couple may no longer align with your current goals or risk tolerance. For example, you may prefer lower-risk investments for stability or growth investments to ensure long-term financial health. Make sure you are clear about your goals and, if necessary, seek a professional financial advisor to walk you through your options.
13. Retirement Planning
If you are years away from retirement, consider how your savings and contributions need to be adjusted. On the other hand, if retirement is near, map out your expected income streams (Social Security, pensions, investment withdrawals) and adjust as needed.
Remember: Your retirement plan transitions from planning for two to planning for one, which could reduce expenses but also affect long-term needs.
Non-Financial Decisions That Carry Financial Consequences
14. Decide if You Need Professional Help
Managing all these changes can feel overwhelming, and you don’t have to do it alone. Consider working with a financial advisor who specializes in estate planning, investing, and retirement strategies for widows. Seeking help isn’t a weakness, but it’s a wise move to ensure you don’t overlook critical details.
15. Take Your Time Making Big Decisions
The loss of a spouse is an emotional event, and emotions can cloud judgment. Let yourself grieve. You don’t have to rush into major financial moves like selling your home, investing large sums, or moving across the country. Give yourself permission to pause and consult with professionals before making decisions that have long-term consequences.
16. Find a New Purpose and Passion
This one isn’t about dollars and cents, but it might be the most valuable “financial” decision you’ll make. Losing your spouse isn’t just a financial transition; it’s a life transition. Once you’ve taken care of the critical financial steps, consider rediscovering your own purpose. Maybe it’s volunteering, reconnecting with hobbies, or spending more time with loved ones. Purpose doesn’t erase the loss, but it fills the space with meaning.
Becoming a widow brings a wave of change. While financial decisions may not be the first thing on your mind, they’re key to creating stability as you navigate your life’s new normal.
If you are walking through widowhood, or even preparing for the possibility, you are not alone. God is with you in the valley of grief, and he promises to be your provider. As Psalm 68:5 says, “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.”
Yes, there will be bills to pay, accounts to close, and decisions to make. But there is also grace for each step. Take it one decision at a time. Lean on trusted help. Above all, rest in the assurance that the God who cared for you in marriage will continue to care for you in widowhood.